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I Hired an Internet Dating Consultant and This Is What I Learned
SPOILER ALERT: IT’S A LOT.
Full confession: I hate internet dating. I am an internet dating consultant. I believe it dilutes the magical process of meeting someone into a sterile affair that makes me feel like I’m an HR rep sifting through endless résumés. It also feeds into the paradox of choice: the seemingly bottomless array of options offered up by internet dating makes people less likely to make any decisions at all. And it’s normalized some truly terrible behavior, like ghosting, orbiting and breadcrumbing, turning people into disposable objects. Not to mention, in the era of tech addiction, I hate the idea of spending any more time scrolling through my iPhone than I absolutely have to.
Given that I’m busy and that it’s so popular, I decided to give the world of internet dating another go, but this time, with some professional assistance. My previously terrible experience with a dating consultant showed me how important it is to get a good one, so I enlisted the help of NYC’s top matchmaker: David Richards Sullivan.
The elite matchmaker, who runs the service Lasting Connections, predominantly works with high-profile clients for a hefty price tag—her services start at $45,000 for a year of in-depth consultanting that includes everything from running your dating profile to choosing your wardrobe. But you get what you pay for and her success rate is one to be envied.
She also provides a virtual consultanting program (rates start at $6,500 for 3 months), in which her Matchmaking Consultant takes over your profile, writing your bio, taking professional shots of you, choosing people for you to message, and providing feedback and guidance on your exchanges.
Not everyone can afford David Richards for individual sessions, but she’s the best, so I recently reached out to her about my own romantic woes, and asked for advice that I could share with other readers struggling in the internet dating world. Here’s what I learned. And for more coverage of the crazy world of dating in 2018, don’t miss the 20 Internet Dating Terms Older People Don’t Know.
1Choose Natural Photos
tinder profile photos
You want your photos to paint a picture of who you are and the exciting life that a potential partner could have if they were with you. Looking over my photos, David Richards liked that I had plenty of images that showed that I’m a fun person who travels a lot and likes to have a good time.
The other benefit is that they make it easy for someone to use the photos as a prompt for a non-generic message. They could see my sailboat photo and ask, “Where was that taken?” or look at the photo of my dog and say, “What’s his name?”
She told me to remove the selfie, because selfies provide a distorted version of your face (which is backed up by studies). She also advises avoiding bathroom selfies, bikini photos for women, or topless shots for men. Make sure to include a few full-body shots, pictures that clearly show your face, and always use recent photos. Don’t use headshots because they make you look stiff and boring. This isn’t LinkedIn!
2Keep the Bio Brief
tinder profile bio
You want to give someone a sense of your personality, but you also want to retain a sense of mystery, so don’t give everything away. Looking at my bio, David Richards thought it was good because it was short, but gave a basic sense of who I am and, again, made it easy for someone to message me based on the information I provided (“What kind of jazz do you like?” What’s your favorite whiskey?”).
She did, however, suggest I remove “Oxford graduate” because it sounds boastful and that can be a turn-off to people. She suggested I let men figure out I’m smart by talking to me instead of spelling it out for them. In general, she advises people avoid listing their degrees, accomplishments, and education. And for more great dating advice, know that these are the All-Time Best Dating App Opening Lines.
3Don’t Write Anything Negative
phrases men over 40 should stop using
The final thing that she asked me to cut was the line that says, “Really don’t care how tall you are.” I put it in there to show that I’m not superficial, which David Richards realizes, but she said that it can also come off as negative, and you want your profile to exude positivity.
In general, her advice was, “Use some sense of humor, of course, but nothing negative and don’t try to explain why you are there. You are on the app or dating site so take responsibility and don’t whine! No one likes whiners!”
For what it’s worth, being negative is on our list of The 12 Biggest Dating Profile Blunders Men Make.
4Try Newer Apps
the league dating app
One of the reasons that I periodically try internet dating again is because you meet happy couples all the time that met on an app. But I notice that I often hear them say things like, “We met on Tinder, back when it was good” or, “We met on Hinge, back when it was good.”
It seems like the trend with dating apps is that the first few cycles of people who join are actually cool people genuinely interested in a relationship, but the latter waves are ones just looking to hook up. David Richards agrees with this, which is why she suggests trying new apps on the market.
A good one is The League, which started out as an “elite” app for Ivy League graduates, and has since expanded to people who are simply smart and driven. She’s also heard good things about a new app called Cheekd, which uses a cross-platform low-energy Bluetooth technology to match you with people who are in your direct vicinity. She’s not a fan of Bumble, which she believes “makes men passive and lazy when they were already passive to begin with.”
5Older People Should Try Internet Websites
50 compliments
David Richards’s older clients have had more luck with internet dating sites rather than apps, in part because there’s a wider selection of people above a certain age. They’ve had particularly good success with Match.com, which has been around since 1995. Remember, just because you’re over 65 doesn’t mean you have to close up shop. As one recent study confirmed, there are plenty of older people who have great sex lives.
If you do want to go with apps, check out The Best Dating Apps if You’re Over 40.
6Ask Something Specific In Your First Message
man on smartphone Life Easier
Shutterstock
As the saying goes, “You only get one chance to make a first impression.” Don’t waste it with something generic like, “Hey, how are you doing?” Ask about something that intrigues you in their profile. But be earnest. Don’t ask about their dog if you hate dogs, or what books they like to read if you don’t care about books. You’re looking for something you can connect on, not just a way to get in the door.
7Go On Several Dates
Fancy dates Being Single in your thirties
David Richards agrees that the paradox of choice is one of the biggest problems engendered by internet dating. “Endless options have kept more people single today,” she once told me. “Everyone thinks the grass is greener on the other side, and that there will always be another option around the corner.” As a result, people have unrealistic expectations, and if they aren’t completely blown away by someone on a first date, they will write them off in favor of going out with a new person, thereby throwing themselves into an endless cycle of first dates.
To combat this, David Richards suggests going outside of your comfort zone and dating people who you might not normally like, and going on several dates before you make up your mind.
“I know someone who went wasn’t into the guy at first and, by the seventh date, she really clicked with him,” she said. “Now they are dating exclusively. We live in a society where people are so easy to say no to. Get to know the person.”
For tips on what not to say on a first date, check out The 17 Worst Things a Man Can Say to a Woman.
8Don’t Make Excuses for Them
50 funniest facts
Shutterstock
One of the latest terrible trends we have to deal with is R-Bombing, and I’ve been experiencing it personally with a guy I recently started seeing. In these cases, it’s easy to make excuses for the other person, and they themselves will usually say things like, “Sorry, I was really busy,” or, “Sorry, I’m just not really good at texting, but I really like you.”
You want to be understanding, so you take what they say at face value, but it’s a bunch of nonsense. People make time for the things they want to make time for. If Obama could schedule Friday date nights with Michelle while he was President of the United States, this person can find time to respond to your text, no matter how busy they are. You can’t expect someone to make you a priority after just a few dates, sure, but you can expect them to show a reasonable amount of courtesy and respect. And not responding to someone is just plain rude, whatever their reasons. Just move on and find someone who doesn’t act like a child.
9Don’t Play Games
woman texting dating
Shutterstock
What goes around comes around. I complain about men not answering me or not being straight with me, but the truth is, I’ve been guilty of doing this with people I wasn’t that into myself. Whether or not you believe in karma or energy, you have to treat people the way you want to be treated. And that means having the courtesy and courage to respond to someone and politely say that you don’t want to meet up again for whatever reason. The other person will respect you for it, you’ll relieve them of frustration or anxiety, and you’ll leave a nice legacy for yourself in their mind.
10Have Sex When You Want to Have Sex
40 compliments, essential dating tips for men over 40
I had a very frustrating phone call with a dating consultant recently, who basically acted like all women need to do to “hook” a man is withhold sex until they agree to be in a relationship. This is terrible advice. With me, I always wait to have sex until I see that we both genuinely mutually respect and like each other, and David Richards agrees that this is a good formula. Sometimes people have sex on the first date and it works out. Sometimes they wait and it doesn’t. There’s no numbered rule that can tell you when it feels right. (And, by the way, recent studies have shown that you’re actually not even more likely to have casual sex if you’re on Tinder.)
11Don’t Be Too Eager
single people tried of hearing
Shutterstock
David Richards says that this is a common issue, especially among women.
“Internet dating is making women more frustrated and men are more aloof,” she said. After going through so many failed attempts, you start to see getting into a relationship as a test that you just can’t seem to pass. Looking over some texts that I exchanged with a recent guy, David Richards correctly identified this as one of my problems. I’m so tired of dating that I make myself too available to men I’m not even that sure about. It has nothing to do with the guy. It just feels like a personal failure to have something not pan out yet again, like internet dating is a claw machine rigged for me to fail. It doesn’t help that I’m selective and don’t find myself attracted to a man very often, which makes someone I’m into feel more precious than they are. David Richards suggested that I stop being so understanding of men’s bad behavior. She told me to be more patient. And then she gave me a piece of advice I want to crochet on a pillow: “Separate the ego from the outcome.” AKA, don’t take it personally; this isn’t a contest.
If you’re feeling over dating, check out these 10 Signs You Have “Dating Fatigue”—And How to Bounce Back.
12It’s Not Just You
make your Instagram compelling, worst dating Phrases
With all of the terrible things people do to each other internet nowadays, it’s easy to think it’s just happening to you, and to let that hurt your self-esteem. Doubts start creeping in. Is there something wrong with me? Why does this keep happening to me? Why does it work out for others and not me? Am I just not good enough?
David Richards has had hundreds of clients and she’s seen it all many times over. All of the stuff that’s happened to you—a guy seeming interested but then suddenly vanishing, a girl who texts a lot but never wants to make plans—happen to everyone all the time, even to people that society deem to have a “high mate value.” As someone who writes about dating a lot, and who takes care to mask identities, people frequently share their tales of woe with me.
A gorgeous lawyer friend of mine recently went on several dates with a man who treated her really well, only to then suddenly dump her for no reason. Another stunning, ambitious friend of mine sent some nudes to a guy who asked for them, only to then never hear from him again (I can only assume he died from the sexiness).
This stuff happens to everyone all the time, and it’s important to remember that. Even if it takes some time to get it right, rest assured: it will work out in the end.
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Would you like some assistance with your web-based dating or exhortation on dating applications? ?
You’ve just got one moment to establish a first connection on the web.
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My Online Dating Coach and Dating App Sessions include:
An underlying internet dating mentor discussion so I can become more acquainted with you – who you really are, your objectives, your way of life and current dating circumstance…
I’ll assist you with concluding which is the best web-based dating website or dating application for you as we are the best internet dating consultants.
The ideal drafting of your profile – remembering guidance for which pictures, side interests and data to incorporate – in light of all that I gained from you during out meeting.
I’ll exhort you regarding which photographs you need to use to get interest. Any corrections to your profile so that it’s actually what you need – thus that it attempts to draw in and resound with individuals you want most… Custom openers to catch their eye quickly (and separate yourself from the 100 others who have reached them up until this point) Interesting internet dating consultant.
When your profile is up, we can likewise go through an hour together or on the telephone really informing singles so you see precisely how to approach and ESCALATE with them rapidly and successfully (even individuals who have great profiles or who can get their messages opened are generally totally ignorant regarding this!)
In the event that you are totally new to web based dating, I would firmly propose you book an Online Dating Coach bundle. Notwithstanding, on the off chance that you have some experience you may just need several meetings
How Online Dating Coaching Works
Internet dating training Sessions should be possible over Zoom or by telephone.
Zoom Coaching
I primarily do my web based dating instructing and dating application training meetings by means of Zoom it is simple basic and allowed to utilize. I have tried different things with this configuration for quite a long time and discover it as compelling as eye to eye meetings. Utilizing Zoom implies I can mentor customers all around the world with practically no requirement for anybody to travel.
Email Coaching
Another choice that functions admirably in the event that you can’t do Skype meetings is standard email. This can some of the time be an extremely viable way set aside effort to consider, investigate and express your issues and I will react with assistance, questions, procedures or suggested assets. I will answer to messages inside 24 hours, however you can take as long as you need or need.
Up close and personal Sessions
(NOT AVAILABLE AT THIS TIME) I am glad to meet up close and personal, likely to time and accessibility. This will typically be in Baker Street, W1.
Span
Web based Dating Coaching and Dating App Sessions are one extended.
Assuming you’d prefer to roll out a genuine improvement in your adoration life, I propose that you focus on a progression of meetings ahead of time. So after the primary beginning meeting (to ensure this suits you) you can either book a bundle (for a markdown) or each in turn. Bundles are substantial for a long time and incorporate free email support between meetings.
Customers as a rule get the best advantage from one week after week meeting for the initial 2 to 3 weeks, and afterward once per month after that. I’m obviously absolutely adaptable to your necessities or prerequisites.
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6 Tips For Writing The Perfect Online Dating Profile
Give a snapshot of who you are, how you live your life and the relationship you are seeking. …
Who you want to meet – the character, not the characteristics. …
Show, don’t tell. …
Leave out the negative and the snarky. …
Decide the story you want to tell.
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I work for many dating sites as a Dating Coach and am involved in all the different areas, such as Online Dating, singles parties and matchmaking. As well as dating coaching, I am also a Relationship Expert and Dating Expert for newspapers, radio and TV and have published fourteen books to teach you how to succeed at online dating, attract women or attract men.
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Need help with your dating profile? We are the best-rated dating profile writer on the planet.
Looking for help with your online dating profile? Here are some great tips. Online dating: Aim high, keep it brief, and be patient
Scientists say the secrets to success in online dating are to aim high, keep your message brief, and be patient.
Playing “out of your league” or dating people considered more attractive than you, is a winning strategy, according to a new analysis of internet daters in the US.
Men had greater success when they approached women they believed were more desirable than themselves.
The new study has been published in the journal, Science Advances. http://advances.sciencemag.org/content/4/8/eaap9815
Internet dating has become the dominant form for those seeking romance – it’s the third most popular means of meeting a long term partner and around half of all 18-34 year olds now use dating apps.
Dating Profile Help – what’s it all about?
We’ve spoken to the experts to get their top tips on making your dating profile work for you.
Creating a dating profile can be scary. After all, it’s not always easy to big yourself up without sounding conceited or (even worse) desperate. But did you know that one in three couples now find love online?
Yes, really.
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In this fast-paced, social media-dependent world, we rely on the Internet for everything – from keeping in touch with old school friends and career networking to ordering takeaways and finding a cat-sitter for that weekend away. So it only seems logical you would use the good old Internet for finding that special someone, too.
In this new report, scientists used a Google-inspired algorithm to understand the desires of people wanting to match up. They analysed messaging and demographic patterns among heterosexual users in New York, Boston, Chicago and Seattle.
They found that both men and women contact potential partners who are, on average, around 25% more desirable than themselves.
Your “desirability”, they found, is not just about the number of messages that you receive, but who you receive them from.
If your messages come from people who have themselves received lots of messages, that makes make you more desirable, according to the study.
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A collection of some of the best dating profiles examples from Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, Hinge, Zoosk, and Match. Along with tips and tricks
best online dating profiles for men
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8 Irresistible Dating Profile Examples For Men
Struggling to come up with the perfect profile to attract women?
dating profile examples for men
You’re not alone. Most men have a very hard time figuring out what to write about themselves on a dating site, much less doing it in a way that women find irresistible. The majority never get it right.
And whether it’s Tinder, Bumble, CoffeeMeetsBagel, Match.com, POF, OkCupid, MillionaireMatch or one of the many others, your dating profile is truly make or break.
Write the wrong thing, and you’re doomed to fail, with your empty inbox serving as a constant reminder that your profile’s problematic.
no dating messages
On the other hand, when you write a compelling profile, you can watch messages from high-quality women pile up in your inbox, and fill your dating calendar like clockwork.
If you’d like to experience that for yourself, you’ve come to the right place. You’re just about to see 8 irresistibly attractive online dating profile examples for guys that you can use today!
Instant Bonus: Get a downloadable version of The 8 Irresistible Profile Examples so you can copy & paste your way to more dates on any dating site or app you choose.
At VIDA, we’ve written 1000s of uber-effective dating profiles for guys like you since 2009. How do we know the profiles really attract beautiful women? We handle the messages and set up the dates too! (Want dates with amazing women too? Click here to find out how we can make that happen for you.)
There are 100s of online dating sites and apps out there, but what reels in the ladies on Tinder will torpedo your chances on Bumble. So we’re not only giving you incredible, witty profile examples you can use, we’re also telling you which dating site or app they work best on.
Let’s get started!
Tinder Profile Example
In general, profiles on dating apps are much shorter than profiles for online dating sites like Match. Tinder’s character limit is 500, and on many apps profiles are even shorter than that.
Tinder profile example
While it’s tempting to skip writing anything at all and just rely on your awesome pictures, why miss the chance to win her over?
If she’s hesitating to swipe right based on your looks alone, she’ll use your profile to make up her mind. And virtually all women will read it before responding to your message.
Epic Tinder profiles have three things in common:
They keep it clean (sleaze doesn’t play well, even on Tinder)
They snag her attention
They maker her laugh, or at least crack a smile
You can get away with more exaggerated humor and funny/cocky attitude on Tinder than you can on other apps and dating sites. So this is your chance to get creative and have a little fun. Here is a funny online dating profile example for men that really works:
“Humorous, Over-The-Top” Profile for Tinder
Tinder bio example for guys
And if you really want to rise above the competition, try a Tinder profile like this:
“You Want Some of This?” Profile for Tinder
Tinder profile example
(For even more fool-proof Tinder profile examples, click here.)
Bumble Profile Example
On Bumble, only women can send the first message – and she’s only got 24 hours to do it. So your profile needs to stand out from all those other guys if you want her to send a message your way.
bumble pick up lines
Bumble mainly attracts women in the 25-35 age range who are intelligent and successful. It’s been marketed as a “woman-friendly” alternative to Tinder, so you definitely want to keep your profile classy to be successful on this app.
Bumble’s 300 character or less limit means you have to make a big impact in a short space. Highlight all your most attractive traits, whether that’s your job, your hobbies, or your love for travel.
But the key here is Show, Don’t Tell. This rule holds true for any type of profile.
She doesn’t want to read a boring list of adjectives.
boring bumble profile example
So don’t tell her that you’re adventurous, loyal, fun, and curious about the world. Nothing about that sentence will hold her interest; she’s already rolled her eyes moved on to the next guy by the time she got to “fun”.
Show her what you’re like instead by giving specific examples of things you’ve done that illustrate qualities like “adventurous”:
“Show, Don’t Tell” Profile for Bumble
Bumble profile example
When space is at a premium, emojis give you a lot of bang for your buck. These colorful symbols instantly convey your message, and only take up 1 character each.
Bumble Profile Using Emojis:
bumble profile with emojis
(For even more short dating profile examples, click here.)
CoffeeMeetsBagel Profile Example
CoffeeMeetsBagel feeds users a limited number of matches per day, so she’ll definitely peruse your profile.
where are my bagels
And the clock is ticking – she’s only got 24 hours to “like” you. You really need to bring your profile writing A-game to this dating app – and that can be hard to do with a 276-character limit!
The women you’ll find on CMB are typically sophisticated, young professionals who are looking for a relationship. The over-the-top attitude you can get away with on a more casual dating app like Tinder can be a turn-off on CMB if women think you’re not taking the app seriously.
But that doesn’t mean you can’t be funny or creative when answering CMB’s three profile questions: “I am…”, “I like…” and “I appreciate when my date…”
The “Show, Don’t Tell” rule still applies, and now we’re going to add another one: The “70/30” rule. On longer profiles, you want 70% of it to be about you, and 30% of it to describe what you’re looking for. CMB profiles lend themselves naturally to this, since the entire last question is all about your dream woman.
Here’s an example to illustrate both rules in action:
“Fool-Proof” Profile for CoffeeMeetsBagel
CoffeeMeetsBagel profile example
(For everything you need to know about meeting high-quality women on CoffeeMeetsBagel, click here.)
Match.com Profile Example
Match is one of the most popular mainstream online dating sites, and it’s a great place to meet attractive, intelligent women. But since it’s so popular among successful, career-driven singles, your profile is up against a lot of competition.
online dating A game
We know a lot of tricks that will triple your response rate on Match, but in order for those to pay off, your profile needs to stand out from the crowd:
“Attention-Grabbing” Profile for Match.com
match profile example for guys
POF Profile Example
POF (PlentyOfFish.com) is one of the most popular free online dating sites out there, with one of the largest user pools. But to attract the pretty fish, your profile needs to be tantalizing bait. (And it helps to know all the Advanced Search hacks, too).
where was the effort here
The good news is, you can reuse the “In My Own Words” section of your Match profile on your POF profile. There’s no need to reinvent the wheel – when you’ve got something good, roll with it.
There is, however, the prominently displayed “First Date” section and you need to knock it out of the park. Anyone can suggest dinner, a movie, meeting for coffee, etc… but why do what everyone else is doing?
Capture her imagination with something so over the top she can’t help but be intrigued, and then suggest the more mundane ‘cup of coffee’ at the end. Here’s an example of a first date idea that’s sure to get her smiling:
“First Date” Example for POF
Plenty of Fish profile example
OkCupid Profile Example
OkCupid is a melting pot of all different types of women, from “alternative” types to hipsters and nerds and everything in between. For maximum success, you want your OkCupid profile to appeal to a broad range of women, because “hot” comes in all categories.
The profiles on OkCupid are comprised of 9 main sections, each with a choice of 5 to 6 prompts. You also have the opportunity to add even more topics to your OkCupid profile if you wish.
For each section you want to fill out, choose the prompt you like best. You can also add a photo.
No matter which prompts you choose to answer from the first two sections, the answers need to catch – and hold – her attention. Only two answers, or “essays”, will be visible on your profile, unless she hits “+more” to see the rest.
Two of the more difficult prompts are “My Self Summary” and “What I’m Doing With My Life.” The others pretty much write themselves….
“Mass Appeal” Profile for OkCupid
OkCupid profile example
OkCupid profile example for guys
(For even more OkCupid profile tips that will help you crush the competition, check out this article.)
MillionaireMatch Profile Example
MillionaireMatch boasts some of most beautiful women and highest response rates of any website we’ve tested. If you’re in the right tax bracket for this type of site, it’s a must use.
As with any “exclusive” dating site, you’ll want to showcase your best assets in your profile, because the most beautiful women on the site have their pick of men. You want to look like an attractive prospect in more than just your photos.
Here’s how to do it right:
“Irresistible” Profile for MillionaireMatch
MillionaireMatch profile example
(For more tips on attracting beautiful women on MillionaireMatch, go here.)
But having the perfect dating profile is just the first step in the process. Once you’ve got her attention, you need to keep it. If your messages suck, it doesn’t matter how good your profile is… you still won’t meet the women you deserve.
Beginning to sound like a lot of work? It is. In fact, the average online dater spends 11.9 hours per week on dating sites (according to academic research). Part time job? You bet!
confused guy on laptop
The worst part is: Most men quit online dating within 3 months due to a lack of results. Clearly, you need more than just a solid dating profile. What you really need is an expert in your corner…
What Beats The World’s Best Dating Profile Examples For Men?
As good as they may be, the examples you’ve seen today cannot compete with a dating profile that’s so uniquely “you” it could never be used by anyone else! After all, there’s a lot of guys out there looking for good online dating profiles to copy.
That’s why our professional dating writers are standing by to craft a highly-personalized, über-compelling profile for you. We’ll build your profile from the ground up, just for you, using a proven formula that’s guaranteed to make your most attractive qualities irresistible to women.
And it doesn’t stop there. We’ll break the ice with highly-qualified matches, handle all your back-and-forth messages, and even set up your dates for you with the women you like best!
Why continue struggling on your own when you can have your online dating done for you by the world’s leading experts? If you’re truly ready to give your dating life an upgrade and meet the woman of your dreams, click here to get the pros on your team today.
About VIDA
VIDA is your very own team of experts who set up high-quality dates for you so you can finally meet your ideal woman. Say goodbye to the hassle and frustration of online dating – we’ll craft an irresistible dating profile, send engaging messages, and even book your dates for you. Thousands of guys have already made lasting connections with beautiful women, and we’re ready to make you our next success story. All you need to do is schedule your free confidential consultation with us now.
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There is no big secret to success when it comes to online dating profiles. It’s not your photo (though a good one helps), nor is it boasts about your stellar career.
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Looking for help with your online dating profile? Here are some great tips. Online dating: Aim high, keep it brief, and be patient
Scientists say the secrets to success in online dating are to aim high, keep your message brief, and be patient.
Playing “out of your league” or dating people considered more attractive than you, is a winning strategy, according to a new analysis of internet daters in the US.
Men had greater success when they approached women they believed were more desirable than themselves.
The new study has been published in the journal, Science Advances. http://advances.sciencemag.org/content/4/8/eaap9815
Internet dating has become the dominant form for those seeking romance – it’s the third most popular means of meeting a long term partner and around half of all 18-34 year olds now use dating apps.
Dating Profile Help – what’s it all about?
We’ve spoken to the experts to get their top tips on making your dating profile work for you.
Creating a dating profile can be scary. After all, it’s not always easy to big yourself up without sounding conceited or (even worse) desperate. But did you know that one in three couples now find love online?
Yes, really.
Dating Profile Help
In this fast-paced, social media-dependent world, we rely on the Internet for everything – from keeping in touch with old school friends and career networking to ordering takeaways and finding a cat-sitter for that weekend away. So it only seems logical you would use the good old Internet for finding that special someone, too.
In this new report, scientists used a Google-inspired algorithm to understand the desires of people wanting to match up. They analysed messaging and demographic patterns among heterosexual users in New York, Boston, Chicago and Seattle.
They found that both men and women contact potential partners who are, on average, around 25% more desirable than themselves.
Your “desirability”, they found, is not just about the number of messages that you receive, but who you receive them from.
If your messages come from people who have themselves received lots of messages, that makes make you more desirable, according to the study.
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A collection of some of the best dating profiles examples from Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, Hinge, Zoosk, and Match. Along with tips and tricks
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8 Irresistible Dating Profile Examples For Men
Struggling to come up with the perfect profile to attract women?
dating profile examples for men
You’re not alone. Most men have a very hard time figuring out what to write about themselves on a dating site, much less doing it in a way that women find irresistible. The majority never get it right.
And whether it’s Tinder, Bumble, CoffeeMeetsBagel, Match.com, POF, OkCupid, MillionaireMatch or one of the many others, your dating profile is truly make or break.
Write the wrong thing, and you’re doomed to fail, with your empty inbox serving as a constant reminder that your profile’s problematic.
no dating messages
On the other hand, when you write a compelling profile, you can watch messages from high-quality women pile up in your inbox, and fill your dating calendar like clockwork.
If you’d like to experience that for yourself, you’ve come to the right place. You’re just about to see 8 irresistibly attractive online dating profile examples for guys that you can use today!
Instant Bonus: Get a downloadable version of The 8 Irresistible Profile Examples so you can copy & paste your way to more dates on any dating site or app you choose.
At VIDA, we’ve written 1000s of uber-effective dating profiles for guys like you since 2009. How do we know the profiles really attract beautiful women? We handle the messages and set up the dates too! (Want dates with amazing women too? Click here to find out how we can make that happen for you.)
There are 100s of online dating sites and apps out there, but what reels in the ladies on Tinder will torpedo your chances on Bumble. So we’re not only giving you incredible, witty profile examples you can use, we’re also telling you which dating site or app they work best on.
Let’s get started!
Tinder Profile Example
In general, profiles on dating apps are much shorter than profiles for online dating sites like Match. Tinder’s character limit is 500, and on many apps profiles are even shorter than that.
Tinder profile example
While it’s tempting to skip writing anything at all and just rely on your awesome pictures, why miss the chance to win her over?
If she’s hesitating to swipe right based on your looks alone, she’ll use your profile to make up her mind. And virtually all women will read it before responding to your message.
Epic Tinder profiles have three things in common:
They keep it clean (sleaze doesn’t play well, even on Tinder)
They snag her attention
They maker her laugh, or at least crack a smile
You can get away with more exaggerated humor and funny/cocky attitude on Tinder than you can on other apps and dating sites. So this is your chance to get creative and have a little fun. Here is a funny online dating profile example for men that really works:
“Humorous, Over-The-Top” Profile for Tinder
Tinder bio example for guys
And if you really want to rise above the competition, try a Tinder profile like this:
“You Want Some of This?” Profile for Tinder
Tinder profile example
(For even more fool-proof Tinder profile examples, click here.)
Bumble Profile Example
On Bumble, only women can send the first message – and she’s only got 24 hours to do it. So your profile needs to stand out from all those other guys if you want her to send a message your way.
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Bumble mainly attracts women in the 25-35 age range who are intelligent and successful. It’s been marketed as a “woman-friendly” alternative to Tinder, so you definitely want to keep your profile classy to be successful on this app.
Bumble’s 300 character or less limit means you have to make a big impact in a short space. Highlight all your most attractive traits, whether that’s your job, your hobbies, or your love for travel.
But the key here is Show, Don’t Tell. This rule holds true for any type of profile.
She doesn’t want to read a boring list of adjectives.
boring bumble profile example
So don’t tell her that you’re adventurous, loyal, fun, and curious about the world. Nothing about that sentence will hold her interest; she’s already rolled her eyes moved on to the next guy by the time she got to “fun”.
Show her what you’re like instead by giving specific examples of things you’ve done that illustrate qualities like “adventurous”:
“Show, Don’t Tell” Profile for Bumble
Bumble profile example
When space is at a premium, emojis give you a lot of bang for your buck. These colorful symbols instantly convey your message, and only take up 1 character each.
Bumble Profile Using Emojis:
bumble profile with emojis
(For even more short dating profile examples, click here.)
CoffeeMeetsBagel Profile Example
CoffeeMeetsBagel feeds users a limited number of matches per day, so she’ll definitely peruse your profile.
where are my bagels
And the clock is ticking – she’s only got 24 hours to “like” you. You really need to bring your profile writing A-game to this dating app – and that can be hard to do with a 276-character limit!
The women you’ll find on CMB are typically sophisticated, young professionals who are looking for a relationship. The over-the-top attitude you can get away with on a more casual dating app like Tinder can be a turn-off on CMB if women think you’re not taking the app seriously.
But that doesn’t mean you can’t be funny or creative when answering CMB’s three profile questions: “I am…”, “I like…” and “I appreciate when my date…”
The “Show, Don’t Tell” rule still applies, and now we’re going to add another one: The “70/30” rule. On longer profiles, you want 70% of it to be about you, and 30% of it to describe what you’re looking for. CMB profiles lend themselves naturally to this, since the entire last question is all about your dream woman.
Here’s an example to illustrate both rules in action:
“Fool-Proof” Profile for CoffeeMeetsBagel
CoffeeMeetsBagel profile example
(For everything you need to know about meeting high-quality women on CoffeeMeetsBagel, click here.)
Match.com Profile Example
Match is one of the most popular mainstream online dating sites, and it’s a great place to meet attractive, intelligent women. But since it’s so popular among successful, career-driven singles, your profile is up against a lot of competition.
online dating A game
We know a lot of tricks that will triple your response rate on Match, but in order for those to pay off, your profile needs to stand out from the crowd:
“Attention-Grabbing” Profile for Match.com
match profile example for guys
POF Profile Example
POF (PlentyOfFish.com) is one of the most popular free online dating sites out there, with one of the largest user pools. But to attract the pretty fish, your profile needs to be tantalizing bait. (And it helps to know all the Advanced Search hacks, too).
where was the effort here
The good news is, you can reuse the “In My Own Words” section of your Match profile on your POF profile. There’s no need to reinvent the wheel – when you’ve got something good, roll with it.
There is, however, the prominently displayed “First Date” section and you need to knock it out of the park. Anyone can suggest dinner, a movie, meeting for coffee, etc… but why do what everyone else is doing?
Capture her imagination with something so over the top she can’t help but be intrigued, and then suggest the more mundane ‘cup of coffee’ at the end. Here’s an example of a first date idea that’s sure to get her smiling:
“First Date” Example for POF
Plenty of Fish profile example
OkCupid Profile Example
OkCupid is a melting pot of all different types of women, from “alternative” types to hipsters and nerds and everything in between. For maximum success, you want your OkCupid profile to appeal to a broad range of women, because “hot” comes in all categories.
The profiles on OkCupid are comprised of 9 main sections, each with a choice of 5 to 6 prompts. You also have the opportunity to add even more topics to your OkCupid profile if you wish.
For each section you want to fill out, choose the prompt you like best. You can also add a photo.
No matter which prompts you choose to answer from the first two sections, the answers need to catch – and hold – her attention. Only two answers, or “essays”, will be visible on your profile, unless she hits “+more” to see the rest.
Two of the more difficult prompts are “My Self Summary” and “What I’m Doing With My Life.” The others pretty much write themselves….
“Mass Appeal” Profile for OkCupid
OkCupid profile example
OkCupid profile example for guys
(For even more OkCupid profile tips that will help you crush the competition, check out this article.)
MillionaireMatch Profile Example
MillionaireMatch boasts some of most beautiful women and highest response rates of any website we’ve tested. If you’re in the right tax bracket for this type of site, it’s a must use.
As with any “exclusive” dating site, you’ll want to showcase your best assets in your profile, because the most beautiful women on the site have their pick of men. You want to look like an attractive prospect in more than just your photos.
Here’s how to do it right:
“Irresistible” Profile for MillionaireMatch
MillionaireMatch profile example
(For more tips on attracting beautiful women on MillionaireMatch, go here.)
But having the perfect dating profile is just the first step in the process. Once you’ve got her attention, you need to keep it. If your messages suck, it doesn’t matter how good your profile is… you still won’t meet the women you deserve.
Beginning to sound like a lot of work? It is. In fact, the average online dater spends 11.9 hours per week on dating sites (according to academic research). Part time job? You bet!
confused guy on laptop
The worst part is: Most men quit online dating within 3 months due to a lack of results. Clearly, you need more than just a solid dating profile. What you really need is an expert in your corner…
What Beats The World’s Best Dating Profile Examples For Men?
As good as they may be, the examples you’ve seen today cannot compete with a dating profile that’s so uniquely “you” it could never be used by anyone else! After all, there’s a lot of guys out there looking for good online dating profiles to copy.
That’s why our professional dating writers are standing by to craft a highly-personalized, über-compelling profile for you. We’ll build your profile from the ground up, just for you, using a proven formula that’s guaranteed to make your most attractive qualities irresistible to women.
And it doesn’t stop there. We’ll break the ice with highly-qualified matches, handle all your back-and-forth messages, and even set up your dates for you with the women you like best!
Why continue struggling on your own when you can have your online dating done for you by the world’s leading experts? If you’re truly ready to give your dating life an upgrade and meet the woman of your dreams, click here to get the pros on your team today.
About VIDA
VIDA is your very own team of experts who set up high-quality dates for you so you can finally meet your ideal woman. Say goodbye to the hassle and frustration of online dating – we’ll craft an irresistible dating profile, send engaging messages, and even book your dates for you. Thousands of guys have already made lasting connections with beautiful women, and we’re ready to make you our next success story. All you need to do is schedule your free confidential consultation with us now.
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Writing A Dating Profile Has Never Been Easier. Over 10,000 Profiles Created! Unlimited Free Revisions. Call For Free Evaluation. Highlights: Online Dating Expert, Serving Since
Dating profile writing help
Dating Profile writing service. The best dating profiles.
There is no big secret to success when it comes to online dating profiles. It’s not your photo (though a good one helps), nor is it boasts about your stellar career.
Fix My Profile is an online dating profile writing service. They’ll craft your dating profile, target your interests, and actively seek people that meet your dating requirements. And once they find some hot prospects, your Dating Profile Assistant will turn on the online charm to woo your date for you. dating profile writer.
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It’s Still Your Profile
We capture your unique voice and personality via a short profile questionnaire. It’s still you, just a better sounding, more interesting version of you.
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Answer a few easy questions, then relax. We’ll choose your top photos and write your bio, so matches will see you in the best light.
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The UK’s leading dating profile writing service.You’ll be in good hands with our dating profile experts. Our team of writers have already helped over 6,000 singles land more dates with an improved dating profile.
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Looking for help with online dating profiles?
The following are 6 Tips For Writing The Perfect Online Dating Profile
In case you are searching for adoration on the web, an extraordinary profile is vital. Obviously you wanted convincing photographs, however the individuals who are searching for a genuine relationship will look past a beautiful face to discover what you are about.
In case you are searching for affection on the web, an extraordinary profile is critical. Obviously you really wanted convincing photographs, however the people who are searching for a genuine relationship will look past a beautiful face to discover what you are about. It would be great if everybody would assume the best about you and mystically see what a captivating, exceptional, cherishing individual you are, yet that is not how web based dating functions.
A nonexclusive profile that doesn’t say a lot or expresses some unacceptable things will be neglected by the very individuals you really desire to associate with. There are bunches of value singles on the web. In the event that you desire to meet one of them, address them, not the majority!
Envision that your ideal accomplice will peruse your profile. How might the person in question remember you as their ideal match?
Follow these significant hints to ensure you are drawing in the perfect individuals on the web!
1. Give a depiction of what your identity is, the manner by which you carry on with your life and the relationship you are looking for.
Your profile should begin by portraying your generally conspicuous and positive person attributes. It is safe to say that you are interesting? Active? Innovative? Faithful? Loving? Mentally inquisitive? Pick 3 or 4 modifiers that best portray your character. In case you’re confused, ask your companions for help portraying you. How might they portray you to somebody they were setting you up with?
Make certain to likewise incorporate what you care about. Try not to utilize the brace of portraying your work and continuing on. It’s anything but a resume, and your work ought to get little concentration. On the off chance that you love your work, say as much. In any case, more critically, what are you energetic about?Do you care most with regards to making music? Helping other people? Winning a genius riding rivalry or safeguarding lost canines? In the event that you care about learning new dialects and stepping through outings to examination your abilities, say as much! The ideal individuals will believe that is wonderful.
Ultimately, speak the truth regarding what you are looking for. Try not to fence and make light of you want to be in a serious relationship, or your craving for the inverse! Keep in mind – you need to draw in individuals who are searching for what you are searching for. Assuming you need a relationship, say as much!
2. Who you need to meet – the person, not the attributes.
I must accentuate this as much as possible. Kindly make certain to say who you need to meet in your profile, without sounding excessively explicit concerning their attributes. Try not to list your optimal accomplice’s leisure activities, tallness, body type, schooling and interests.
At the point when you center around character, you are being explicit regarding your qualities, which will resound with similar individuals. In the event that you center around attributes you hazard sounding shallow, inflexible, or excessively demanding. These are not appealing characteristics!
For instance, instead of indicating the quality of “throwing a tantrum body,” you should express the person attribute of “dynamic” or “esteeming wellbeing and wellness.” The primary model is about a result (fit body), the last is about a lifestyle (being dynamic and dealing with yourself). The previous bars individuals who don’t need somebody who is excessively worried about appearances (regardless of whether they, when all is said and done, are fit), and the last incorporates those fit individuals who care about more than the shallow.
Keep in mind – you have as of now began your profile by saying what your identity is and what you’re into – in case somebody is as yet perusing, they’re as of now charmed by you and what you care about. On the off chance that you truly need to meet somebody who loves cruising on the grounds that cruising is your obsession, that individual who additionally cherishes cruising is now snared when they read that cruising is your obsession! On the off chance that they disdain cruising, disdain the water and disdain mariners, they’re as of now gone.
3. Show, don’t tell.
At the point when you are expounding on what your identity is and how your carry on with your life, make certain to show the peruser what that resembles in real life. You are attempting to draw in the perfect individuals to you, and to do that you should be explicit.
For instance, many individuals say in their profiles they like to travel. “Travel” could mean anything from an excursion to Disneyworld to climbing the Appalachian Trail to a Mediterranean voyage to an extravagance safari in Kenya. Try not to expect that the peruser will know which of these you’d be into!
Talk about your cherished travel locations, your fantasy get-away or the best excursion you at any point took – the individual who adores your sort of movement – or is interested by it – will observe!
Maybe than saying “I love to have a good time” say “I love having a great time – my ideal end of the week incorporates bowling, a Netflix gorge and a hotcake informal breakfast.” That’s not every actually a good time for individual, yet in case it’s yours – own it!
In the event that one of your characterizing esteems is unwaveringness, show what that resembles in your life. When you are infatuated, would you say you are your accomplice’s greatest team promoter? Have you remained by your darling losing ball club? Or then again your youth closest companions? Seek your life for genuine models!
The special reward of explicitness is it gives individuals who need to connect with you a “snare” to specify in a message to you.
4. Leave out the negative and the snarky.
It astounds me the number of individuals utilize their valuable profile land to discuss what they don’t need or about their criticism, sharpness or cynicism.
Cynicism is so not hot!
In addition to the fact that you come across as negative, yet you additionally give the feeling that you are the very thing you guarantee not to need. On the off chance that you say “busybodies need not matter” I will expect that you have huge loads of relationship show, which implies you don’t have the mindfulness to perceive the amount of it you make!
The better you are at drawing in the ideal individuals, the more some unacceptable ones will not be drawn to you. Other than – you can’t try not to be reached online by certain individuals you would prefer not to date – that is decent. Your spotlight rather ought to be on being reached by those you would like to date!
It is more powerful to zero in on drawing in the ideal individuals than repulsing some unacceptable ones.
Another normal entanglement is mockery in the profile. You may be wry, and that may be what individuals who realize you love about you. However, mockery doesn’t decipher well in an internet based profile, particularly in case you are a lady! Ladies may be really lenient, however not many men will be immediately attracted to a lady who leads with mockery.
5. Choose the story you need to tell.
Your profile recounts a story. It shouldn’t be a novel (look at this as a little something extra tip!), yet a brief tale that catches your character. It may recount the account of an athletic, goal-oriented world voyager, or a nerdy, earnest self observer. Or on the other hand it could recount the narrative of a harsh, requesting fussbudget. Survey your profile, photographs and text together and ask yourself:
Who am I making an appearance as? What story am I recounting my life?
Your story is directing who is drawn to you, so ensure you are commanding the notice of the ideal individuals. In case you’re not ready to be evenhanded with regards to your profile, ask somebody you trust to peruse it for you. Is it featuring your most desirable characteristics? What are you saying hidden therein? Is it what your ideal accomplice needs to hear?
It is safe to say that you are communicating what is both interesting to you and what is alluring to who you need to date? On the off chance that you can do that, you are winning! Also, you very well could meet the ideal individual for you on the web.
6. Really look at your spelling and sentence structure.
Since we’re looking at composing a profile, I need to specify spelling and punctuation. There is a ton of terrible spelling and language out there. Furthermore, there are a great deal of online profiles that rundown spelling errors and terrible syntax as an annoyance. Also, a portion of those equivalent individuals have spelling mix-ups and terrible language structure in their profiles!
A lot of individuals will be excusing of errors, however don’t hazard winding down somebody since you didn’t utilize spellcheck.
The mindfulness and care you put into your profile will show and be valued by others. So put forth the attempt to tidy up your errors!
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